Same Old, Same Old

The last time we met our heroine, she was working at Starbucks and Rung Boutique and boyfriend-less.

Now, eight months later,

I'm still working at Starbucks and Rung Boutique.

I've applied for many other jobs. I interviewed twice and was rejected for both. I'm starting to get pretty discouraged.

I'm still single as hell.

I'm trying online dating again, and pretty indifferent about it.

I did NaNoWriMo, and failed. But I'm still working on my novel, which is a change from the two previous years' attempts. I actually managed to create a story I care about. I might have even won this year if I didn't work twelve hour days.

I've discovered one of my problems with my lack of plan for my life is too many choices. I get paralyzed by all the options. I could do anything with my life, and that's what's overwhelming. Having too many options is the same as having none.

I self isolate. The more time I spend alone, the more time I want to spend alone, until it all builds up and I feel completely and utterly alone...because I made it that way. So if I don't call or text, it doesn't mean I don't care. It just means I'm a hermit.

I love my two roommates even more than I did eight months ago. Honestly, I have no idea what I would do without them. They are family.

This is supposed to be fun.

 I tend to be a bit of a perfectionist. I want to do something right. And if it isn't exactly right, I kind of stress out about it.

But I've decided. I'm not going to stress out about NaNoWriMo anymore.

No more getting worried about being a few thousand words behind the daily goal.

No more getting worried I won't finish.

No more beating myself up if things aren't going the way I expected.

I'm going to write what I write, and I'm going to enjoy it. I'm not even going to think about the 50,000 words.

Because isn't the whole point of NaNoWriMo to just write and have fun?

Hey, writers. Give me advice.

I'll be perfectly honest. I'm procrastinating right now.

I've been trying to be good this weekend. I've been trying write and write like a good little NaNoWriMo-er. I even drove down to visit Emily, so we could write together.

But friends, I am a couple thousand words short of where I should be. I'm so far from being on track.

I am so discouraged right now.

I want to win so badly this year, mostly because I lost last year.

Here are some of my problems:

• I am so incredibly unfocused. I have complete ADD. 
• I am not emotionally connected to my characters. I haven't discovered why I care about their story. (This is a big one.)
• I don't really like my main character. I think she's kind of a brat who has no sense of familial duty. (This is another big one.)
• I can't decide on a narration technique.

So, friends, this is where I ask for advice. Any tricks I should try to get back on track? Any tips on focusing?

This is what you get.

NaNoWriMo starts today. National Novel Writing Month. Crazies like me and Emily attempt to write a 50,000 word novel in 30 days.

I'm trying to get a jump start on my novel today. So instead of a post, you get some David Tennant. Happy Thursday, and Happy NaNoWriMo!