Friday, December 20, 2013

Perils of Online Dating

Now that I've reentered the horrible world of online dating, I've discovered that most men, at least the ones who seem to be interested in me, are incapable of stringing together more than one sentence at a time. Occasionally said men are incapable of even stringing together more than one word at a time.

These are some real first messages I've gotten from guys on the site I'm using:

nice pic
I think we need to go on a date...
Introverts unite! Hello, How are you?
Hi beautiful how are you can we talk please bc i really want to get to know u better 
You're beautiful
Your a knockout love (: Would you ever be interested in a FWB thing? 

And then, add to this list a "friend" of a friend's harassing me because said friend wouldn't date him.

Yeeeeeah.... Source

But honestly, do they really think that a simple "hi" is enough to woo me? I realize that I've railed against online dating before, and it's tendency to make me feel as though I was advertising myself.

But please. You need to at least make an effort to gain and keep my attention long enough to send you a reply. Let's all be honest here, if you at the very least can't be bothered to write Y-O-U instead of just "u," and/or don't know when to use "you're" and "your," then I probably won't be attracted to you anyway.

Every time I log in to the site, I wonder if I'm wasting my time. But I still find myself browsing through profiles and reading single sentence messages from inarticulate dudes who are probably just looking for booty anyway.

Stay tuned. There WILL be more complaining soon.


  1. Ok, what's a "FWB thing"?

    --your (apparently old and clueless) mother

  2. Oh...well. He actually asked that? Yukk!