There's a question I've been asking. A question, I'm sure, everyone eventually asks in their lifetime, probably more than once, even. The question?
What am I for?
Is there some sort of goal I'm supposed to aim for, some sort of purpose my life is supposed to serve? Is there more to the menial life I lead of work, sleep, and church?
Not to say church is menial. Being a Christian in itself gives life some sort of meaning. However, just because one believes in God doesn't mean one will never feel as though they're wandering in the woods. Which is what I frequently feel like I'm doing.
I have this silly idea that I was supposed to have it all figured out by now. If any of you actually knew what you wanted to do by the time you were 26, please comment below.
Maybe I've got it wrong. Maybe there isn't some grand design for our lives, some one singular goal to strive for.
I'll confess, part of me has bought into the lie that society is peddling that your worth lies in your job, in how much money you make, in the things that you have. When I feel bad about the fact that I work an hourly wage job in the service industry, I have to consciously remind myself that it's all a lie. Everything about my current job, according to culture, is bad. An hourly wage is somehow lower in stature than a salary; serving someone is somehow lower in stature than ruling over someone.
All of this said and done, I don't want to work for Starbucks forever.
I would like it if one of you could post in the comments some steps, a list I could follow in order to succeed at life. That would be super handy, although I'm pretty certain it doesn't work like that.
I didn't stumble into a "career" until I was 35, if that helps. Until then, I was working, paying the bills, and learning skills that DID eventually come in handy when I did happen upon something I felt was what I wanted to keep doing. BUT, the only reason I ended up in the job that eventually led me to that career was because I got turned down for a job a few months before that I thought was the job I absolutely had to have and I was perfect for. So my point (and I do have one...) is that things can sneak up on you and later you think, "ohhh....so THAT'S what God was up to there..."
ReplyDeleteIt will all come together. You're doing fine...responsible, self-sufficient, a good friend and a great daughter, and the apple of God's eye. The rest will come.
I love you.
-Mom
I didn't figure out what I wanted to do until I was 30, then it took another 6 years to get there. Even after getting there, I have had changes within that, some I would have never anticipated.
ReplyDeleteI have had some jobs that were okay, some that were good and others that were pretty lousy. They all taught me something and looking back on it, I wouldn't trade any of them.
Sometimes what puts food on the table is our passion and love. Other times it is simply a job. Be open to how God can use your passion for others. Feed and fuel that passion.
Trust in yourself, trust in what God is shaping you into. God hasn't forgotten you.